Women are luckier than men when it comes to a self-inspired orgasm. There is very little clean-up afterwards. With men, coming is a much messier business. This article is about where you can shoot your wad when the chicken's been choked to fulfillment. In other words, it's about where to spew the "goo."

Hand

This is a method used when there is no tissue, washcloths, socks or ice trays are around. Keep your fingers together and cup your palm and let go. Then quickly find a sink and wash the wizz away.

Tissue

Tissues are easy and convenient to use. Just keep a box near where you're wanking over at and grab one when you're about to come and catch your load. Tissues with lotion on them are best.

Washcloth

The nice thing about washcloths is you can heat them up with water and come into something soft and warm. Never just rinse it out and hang it up. Someone might end up using it on their face or hands.

Toilet

This option requires control and a sharp eye, but if you can hit the bowl it is the neatest way to clean up after a handjob. No evidence is left behind

Shower

Jerking off in the shower is safe, easy and carefree. There's usually a variety of items you can use as lube, such as hair conditioner, soap, liquid soap, shampoo. When you're finished, a bit of warm water will wash it right down the drain.

Sock

Tube or sweat socks are the perfect catcher's mitt. When you're finished, you can either throw it in the dirty laundry or under the bed. Don't use dress socks. They're too thin and messy.

T-shirt

A t-shirt is large enough to use it on more than one workout session. Check your t-shirts for crustiness before you put them on. Dried sperm on your clothing wouldn't be a very good fashion statement.

Condom

Best to get it on is when you first begin to get hard. When you finish wanking, just toss it away. No muss. No fuss.

Plastic Bag

Plastic bags are convenient, clean and a great way to jerk off when you are someplace you can't easily get rid of your release. Also, if you add a little lubricant to the bag, it makes a great masturbation aid.

Plants

You can blow your wad into the bushes outside or fertilize your houseplant by shooting a little sperm into the soil. Everyone will exclaim over how lush and green your plants are, and want to know your secret.

Ice Tray

Cryogenics anyone? It's doubtful your sperm will be viable once thawed. Simply release into an ice cube tray and freeze the contents. Make sure if anyone needs ice, you're the one who gets it.

Scrapbook

If you want to "keep your memories" of a great wanking job, buy a scrapbook with very thick pages to record the event. Simply come on an empty page, let dry and add any comments you want to commemorate the moment.

Shot Glass

A great option if you want to measure your come. If you are one of those guys who like to drink their own spunk, you can drink it straight or mix it with your fav fruit juice or liquor if that's your kink.

A word of warning. Not everything you read here about sperm disposal is recommended and is just presented as viable options. However, if you try some of the more different methods they could add a little welcome kinkiness to your "private sessions." That's always good.